The dream is born early on because as little girls we all long for a beautiful wedding, a happy home, and a fairy-tale ending.
But in a world full of sin and brokenness, things don’t always go as planned and life turns out to be less than we hoped for.
When I found myself standing in the smoldering ruins of another marriage gone up in flames, it was all I could do not to go out looking for yet another new husband. It’s hard being alone when you feel like you’ve just watched your last chance at love slip away. So I struggled to find peace in my circumstances as I resigned myself to spending the last four or five decades of my life as a single in a world full of happy couples.
But that all changed when a friend said to me one day, “Your next husband will want a Mary Magdalene. That’s a word for you, Amy.”
Her words stirred me deeply since that old longing for a husband was not really gone at all, but just buried down deep in my heart. My next husband? This was exciting news! So I set out on a quest that day to prepare for him, and I made it my mission to become a Mary.
I immediately did what any good girl would do. I ran to the Word and sought to list all of Mary’s attributes so I could copy them.
But I only found one thing to copy.
All I found worth copying was that Mary pursued Jesus and let go of the rest. She didn’t have to tear herself away from anything to spend time with Jesus because He was her first choice. So out of this desire to do as Mary did, I began to pray a new prayer: Lord, make me a Mary.
And let me just tell you. That one little prayer? It’s wrought untold change in my life.
I’ve learned I’ll never find peace if I make people the center of my world. I’ve learned to turn to the One Love who will never fail me. I’ve figured out that His is the only love that can heal my broken heart.
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So yes, it’s true. At first I wanted to be like Mary so I’d be more appealing to my future Mr. Right. But somehow God took the road I traveled and wound it into a path leading me back to Himself, showing me along the way that His love for me reaches depths no husband’s could match.
I do still long for a husband. Of course I do. But He’s taught me that the gigantic blessing of a husband is still not enough to heal me or fulfill me or redeem my life from destruction. Jesus is the One I need. And I want to deepen this grace-filled relationship and devote myself to the one true Love of my life first before He blesses me with another earthly love. It’s the only way I can be good for anybody anyway.
I don’t know what’s ahead, and it doesn’t matter what’s already happened. All I know now is that I want to follow Jesus today and for the rest of my life. I know I can trust Him to work all things together for my good. I know I want to run after Him with the same passion as Mary did. I know lives change when we choose Him first.
So whether we’re single or married, may we pursue Him with passion. Care to pray it with me?
Lord, make me a Mary.
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Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind. Luke 10:27 NIV
