Identity In Christ

The Weight of Discontent

May 18, 2012 By Kris Camealy Leave a Comment

I’ve never met a woman who didn’t want to be considered beautiful. Lord knows I have struggled with the longing to be something other than myself. It seems we are genetically predisposed to wrestling insecurities about our physical appearance.

The truth is, beauty can be a burden. I knew it when I saw these hyacinths bent low, laying down heavy in the soil.

Ripe with blossoms, these beautiful girls can no longer stand up under the weight of their own glory.

Maybe longing for outward beauty is asking for a burden, more than a gift. Lesser flowers don’t struggle with this. Their small, yet striking blooms suit their narrow stems, they stand tall–unwavering. Sometimes what appears as less, really is more.

This got me thinking that beyond craving physical beauty, often times other places provide opportunity for us to be discontent–to wish we were something more, something other than.

Instead of longing for beauty, a bigger “flower bed” to bloom in, a more fragrant witness, or greater abundance of blossoms, we ought to crave the smaller things.

Scripture repeatedly tells us to become more for Him, we must become less. (“He must become greater; I must become less.” John 3:30, NIV)

It doesn’t get more backwards than that. Why? Because our pride is a sin–a direct affront to our heavenly Father who created us, just as we are.

“God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” James 4:6

I can write this not because I have arrived, but because this is my own journey. How much of my life have I lived wishing I was more–

God sweetly whispers it to me, “You’re enough”.

I argue with Him, certain He doesn’t intend those words for me when He breathes them into my heart. I have never felt like enough.

But I know it, as I walk through this struggle, one imperfect footfall after another–He is talking to me. He’s talking to you.

Girlfriend, you are already beautiful. (You are altogether beautiful, my love;
there is no flaw in you. Song of Solomon 4:7)

You are already fragrant with the sweet aroma of grace poured out from the Father who made you. (Because of Christ, we give off a sweet scent rising to God, which is recognized by those on the way of salvation—an aroma redolent with life.You are right where He wants you to be for this moment, and you bloom boldly for Him. 2 Corinthians 2:15, The Message)

Trust that God will provide you with everything you need. You don’t need to be anything other than you are. Get low with me. Decrease and let Him increase.

What insecurities are you struggling with? How can we pray for you? Would you whisper it here in the comments and let us hold your hand and pray over you? We’d be honored.

Filed Under: Beauty In The Everday, Identity In Christ, True Beauty, Womanhood

3 Ways to Celebrate Your Life

May 17, 2012 By Daniele Evans 8 Comments

We are all seeking to live purposeful lives. As women, mothers, wives, we want our days to count, our actions to matter.

Perhaps you’re like me: a goal-setter, list-lover, gotta stay-on-tracker that truly appreciates big dreams broken down into manageable pieces to tackle. I’m also known to ‘fly by the seat of my pants’ when it comes to creative ideas or thoughts, so really…I’m a bit eclectic in my approach. Ahem.

However we ride these waters of navigating our days, I’m becoming more convinced of one principle for us all:

We should celebrate our lives.

We think of improving our lives, of areas needing change and ways to sharpen the saw. Yet, in this productivity-driven society, do we pause to enjoy and acknowledge our accomplishments? How often do we stop and celebrate not only birthdays, anniversaries, as important as they are…

…but also the work of our hands (and minds, and hearts).

Scripture is abundant with celebration. God-ordained feasts filled the calendar of His people – ways to pause and remember seasons gone well. I believe the same holds true for us today. We too should find ways to celebrate!

Celebrate Milestones

As you set out new goals to tackle, give a shout out for one that you’ve already crossed off your list! Big or simple achievements, new skills acquired, tough decisions made, or anything else you can think of. Yes, move forward and reach toward the next step. And, YES! celebrate the ones you’ve already taken.

Celebrate Saying Goodbye

Have you left behind a bad habit, an unhealthy lifestyle, or worked hard to shed a few? Are you overcoming fear, the comparison trap, or finally forgave that individual? By all means — Celebrate! Grab up a few trusted friends, share your steps forward and together wildly give thanks for how far you’ve come. Think it’s a little self-centered? Well, wouldn’t you attend such a party for a friend?

Celebrate Who You Are

…and release who you’re not. Really sometimes, our approach at self-improvement are wistful attempts to carbon-copy someone else. We can recognize and desire a character quality in another person without trying to be them. God isn’t interested in clones! Are you learning new things about yourself? Define it, acknowledge it — and celebrate who you are.

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Why not start now? Write in and share a milestone or celebration — we’d love to shout out with you!

{photo credit}

Filed Under: Identity In Christ

Are you called to be Small?

May 11, 2012 By Jana Driggers Leave a Comment

image via alcomm | flickr creative commons

Friends, I’d like to ask you a question today: Why do you blog?

Not “why do people in general blog” or “why do you think you should blog”, but why do YOU, really?

Each of us started with something in mind when we first took that deep breath and nervously hit ‘publish‘. Was it merely a way to share photos of baby’s adorable toothless grin with faraway relatives? A love of words and stories that needed an outlet? The need to earn extra income to support your family? A desire to connect with others?

Whatever your reason, you made the commitment to put yourself out there, and that’s no small accomplishment. But somewhere along the way, it’s easy to get caught up in the game….

For the rest of this post head over to the Allume blog and join me as we discuss why we blog.

Filed Under: Bloom In Blogging, Community, Encouragement, Identity In Christ Tagged With: Allume, blogging, connecting, dreams, encouragement, small bloggers

pruning “if we just” statements

May 3, 2012 By Rachel Martin 12 Comments

You know what I am talking about.

It’s the if we just statements.

If we just did this, we tell ourselves.
If we just lost this.
If we just got up earlier.
If we just cleaned more.
If we just spent less money.
If we just couponed more.
If we just didn’t complain.
If we just worked harder.
If we just homeschooled.
If we just sent our kids to school.
If we just had a better schedule.
If we just volunteered more.
If we just read that book.
If we just did stuff like her.
If we just, if we just, if we just…

What are we doing?

Seriously, friends, my sisters, what are we doing?

There is no ladder of motherhood success. There is no ultimate homemaker. No winner of the blogging world. No amazing wife of the year. And yet, we hold this if we just bar up high for ourselves and often cut ourselves short in what we did do.

What if we just learned to love ourselves the way the Lord sees us? Seriously. What if we worked, and we did our best, our very best, and went to bed at night feeling good about us? About our day? About our family? About what we did do?

What if we stopped asking ourselves if we just and instead defined our worth through the Lord?

We could spin and spin and spin telling ourselves if we just statements throughout our lives. We lose the real, the present, when we allow ourselves to sit in the if we just times of life. Instead of staying there — Do — Define priorities. More often then not you will discover that many of those if we just statements pull us from those that matter most. Our family. Our spouses. Our friends. We run ourselves ragged trying to keep every duck in a row, trying to keep the if we just statements at bay, and we go to bed exhausted thinking we’ll never measure up.

If we just…

Life is not meant to be lived with if we just statements defining us.

Figure out what matters most to you. Do your very best.

Sisters, again, do your very best. Wake up in the morning, dedicate your day to the Lord, move through your day, doing your best.

And do not not let if you just define you – prune that this spring.

Instead, let the Lord define you.

And that? That is beautiful.

Filed Under: Encouragement, Grace, Identity In Christ, Renewing The Mind, Sisterhood

Change and Acceptance

April 19, 2012 By Eryn Hall 11 Comments

I’m not who I was.

Eight years ago, my life was very different than the one I live today. If you knew me back then, you knew a girl who was selfish, immature, careless. Oh sure, I was nice and fun, I had friends and busied myself with stuff. But there was no purpose to my moments other than to do whatever pleased me. Even though I knew about God and gave my life to Him as a teenager, I wasn’t living my life for Him. I’d heard the story of Jesus, but my prayers were only sent up on an as-needed basis, and truthfully, it was more like begging.

And then, about 8 years ago, I opened myself to a relationship and fell in love with the Lord. I read all about Him, learned all about His ways. I determined in my heart to live in a way pleasing to Him. And my life changed. I was changed.

I looked the same on the outside, yet my behaviors were different. I was still a nice and fun girl, maybe nicer? And my fun became the good, careful, guilt-free kind. I thought about myself less and of others more. The closer I got to Jesus, the more I learned to know and express forgiveness, hope, grace, and unconditional love. I want to serve Him and I want people to get a glimpse of Jesus when they see me.

My life is very different now. Jesus is in every moment of every day. My prayer life is an ongoing dialog and I’m constantly praising Him. My life is different because it is tethered to Jesus Christ and God, now and forever.

There are some people in my life, though, that refuse to accept the changed me. They see me now, acting in a manner that seems foreign. Because they knew the old me, maybe they think I’m faking this new life. They hear me speaking the truth or praying God’s Word, and they shrug, thinking this “trend” I’ve caught on to will eventually pass and I’ll be back to the Eryn they knew. But, thank God, I’m not going back to who I was. I’ve been set free by God’s amazing grace.

And it’s hard to explain. This is the Eryn they knew, only now she lives with purpose. Now she has a light on the inside, a promise. Now she has a grasp on what this life is all about. It’s still me!

I can’t avoid my friends and loved ones who are waiting for me to change back. And I certainly can’t run in circles trying to prove my new self. All I can do is continue to live this life for God, be my new self confidently, and be an example to those around me. Even if the new me is not accepted by the people who knew me before, I know it’s okay to be changed.

It’s okay to be changed. I am accepted by Jesus.

You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

Ephesians 4:22-24 NIV

“God chose us to belong to Christ before the world was created. He chose us to be holy and without blame in his eyes. He loved us. So he decided long ago to adopt us as his children. He did it because of what Jesus Christ has done. It pleased God to do it. All those things bring praise to his glorious grace. God freely gave us his grace because of the One he loves.”

Ephesians 1:1-6 NIRV

image source

Filed Under: Encouragement, Freedom In Christ, Grace, Identity In Christ, Salvation

Trading Our Past For A Crown Of Victory

April 12, 2012 By Denise Thompson 30 Comments

Wearing my hurtful past like a crown of honor was all I knew to do. I was all too familiar dragging around the baggage of my painful memories because I felt entitled and the need to let you know that I had been victimized. If you had met me 15 years ago, and knew me for any amount of time I would have felt the need to tell you my story–one of abuse in childhood, heartache and loss. Then 11 years ago I would have piled on more details of a marriage gone bad, a husband who left, because telling about my past made me feel validated.

Then one day it all changed–that was the day I turned in my crown of hurts and dethroned the dejected old me. God spoke to me about how I was nursing and rehearsing my old wounds. He taught me through his word and through sound teaching that I needed to forgive and release my past so he could do a new work in my life. God showed me how as I was repeating the offenses but wasn’t becoming free, and remaining bound up.

That was the day I traded my victim role and claimed a life of victory.

Now I am not going to minimize the fact that I was a victim of abuse, but I no longer had to stay in that stagnant place. As I began to identify with my Heavenly Father I then could take on the beautiful daughter role that was intended for me all along–a place of royalty as a princess of the Most High King. I could now wear the sash of a rescued and redeemed daughter and display a crown of beauty. I finally realized that God had seen my hurt–he had been concerned about everything I had endured in my past, but he now wanted to use my story for his glory.

to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor. Isaiah 61:3

Over time I learned to trade my insecurities and lack of trust for a father who would never leave me or forsake me. I could embrace a daddy who didn’t care if I was skinny or fat–one who didn’t care if I performed perfectly. An Abba father who never raised his voice in anger and accepted me just as I was.

Now I am beginning to tell parts of my story with others because I can now share it from the view of redemption. See, before I could share my testimony there had to be a time of healing and forgiveness. The pivotal moment when I realized I was free was the day I could pray for my offenders–when I could feel compassion for them with a genuine kindness. I then knew God had renewed my heart and given me a new song to sing–a new story to tell.

I will always be effected by my past and it has shaped who I am today–the difference is the motive by which I share it. I am offering hope and my story is being offered with out stretched arms as a blooming bouquet not a dark memory. Now as I tell you who I am it isn’t told from a view of anger or bitterness, but one of gratitude and grace. One of beauty from ashes. It is a miracle!

I pray that if you have been a victim of abuse, or are struggling with past hurts, loss, or unforgiveness, that you will allow God to wrap his arms around you and bring you into a new life in Him. That as you walk out the day to day, you will find healing in God’s word and renewal of your mind.

The Most High King is ready for you–His beautiful daughter. He wants to see you experience all that is waiting for you. We are sisters and together we can walk in freedom to use our stories for his glory and trade our victim roles for victory!

Will you join me?

Filed Under: Forgiveness, Freedom In Christ, Identity In Christ

Our Jesus Shaped Hole

April 10, 2012 By Kamille Scellick 24 Comments

Can I be completely honest with you?

Before Sisters in Bloom launched, as the ladies gathered getting to know one another, I found myself wondering if this place was really for me.

An extrovert who often sits on the sidelines observing the crowd before jumping in. My heart’s desire is to fit in, but even as a writer here, I felt out of place. Where did I fit in?

Finding myself, my voice, and affirmation is a struggle. Yet, I think one thing which strings us all together here, in this place…is our common desire to want to be heard, known & valued. Searching in so many places for our voice & approval, ending with empty hands & hopeless dreams.

Our voice becomes muted or lost in translation.

What we want others to see is essentially what Jesus has always seen. Do we believe that we are women worth getting to know? Do we believe that we have gifts that need to be shared with others? Do we believe that our hearts are shaped with a Jesus sized hole and only he is the one who can fill it?

I often don’t believe that.

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After my last post here at SIB, I found myself hovered over my computer throughout the next couple hours awaiting new comments. All the while, feeling like my heart had eaten a bag of potato chips, a liter of soda & a king size chocolate bar. It was hungry, but was left with that junk food soul feeling.

How often do I fill my soul with junk food as I turn on Facebook, Twitter, check my blog, all in the hopes that someone will validate me, give my voice accreditation, or comment on how amazing “my words” are to them.

My soul turns into starvation mode with self-pity and worthlessness, and all the while Jesus is saying, “Oh, Kamille, I love you because you are. When will you realize that?”

Do we believe that his value & thoughts of us are more than enough? Is it when someone we respect and admire validates us or re-tweets our words? Is it when that “cool” woman invites us over to her house or into her circle? When we get a promotion, achieve a personal best at the gym, or get feedback of how well our children have behaved? Or, is it when we get “X” amount of blog hits or comments in a day?

When I find myself in that black hole of despair as I check to see if anyone has a left a comment on my blog, I hear my Savior say, “How many is enough? How many comments do you need to feel like it will be enough to fill that space within?” He says this as tears form.

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Sitting on my oldest daughter’s floor, while reading You Are Special by Max Lucado. The main character/Wemmick Punchinello has been labeled by the other Wemmicks as clumsy & a mishap. He can’t jump high. He says dumb things. He begins to believe that this is who he is. I look at my sweet girl with her own set of gross & fine motor inabilities, some matching that of Punchinello. Her eyes widen & ears open to Punchinello’s labels; as if, knowing that somehow, they have something in common.

What came next I wasn’t prepared for. Eyes misty, throat tightening as what seems like my daughter’s words, Punchinello asked Eli the Jesus character, “Me special?…I can’t jump…Why do I matter to you?”

He responds, “Because you’re mine, that’s why you matter to me!“

Just as I see my sweet girl not by her physical ability, or worldly standards…Jesus doesn’t judge me on them either, and he doesn’t judge you on those as well. We all have a Jesus shaped hole in our hearts that has always been meant for him, and no one else.

What are you filling in your Jesus shaped heart? Where are you finding it hard to trust him when he tells you, “You are enough. You are beautiful,”? How can I pray for you as you rest in his approval & his infinite love for you?