Grace

pruning “if we just” statements

May 3, 2012 By Rachel Martin 12 Comments

You know what I am talking about.

It’s the if we just statements.

If we just did this, we tell ourselves.
If we just lost this.
If we just got up earlier.
If we just cleaned more.
If we just spent less money.
If we just couponed more.
If we just didn’t complain.
If we just worked harder.
If we just homeschooled.
If we just sent our kids to school.
If we just had a better schedule.
If we just volunteered more.
If we just read that book.
If we just did stuff like her.
If we just, if we just, if we just…

What are we doing?

Seriously, friends, my sisters, what are we doing?

There is no ladder of motherhood success. There is no ultimate homemaker. No winner of the blogging world. No amazing wife of the year. And yet, we hold this if we just bar up high for ourselves and often cut ourselves short in what we did do.

What if we just learned to love ourselves the way the Lord sees us? Seriously. What if we worked, and we did our best, our very best, and went to bed at night feeling good about us? About our day? About our family? About what we did do?

What if we stopped asking ourselves if we just and instead defined our worth through the Lord?

We could spin and spin and spin telling ourselves if we just statements throughout our lives. We lose the real, the present, when we allow ourselves to sit in the if we just times of life. Instead of staying there — Do — Define priorities. More often then not you will discover that many of those if we just statements pull us from those that matter most. Our family. Our spouses. Our friends. We run ourselves ragged trying to keep every duck in a row, trying to keep the if we just statements at bay, and we go to bed exhausted thinking we’ll never measure up.

If we just…

Life is not meant to be lived with if we just statements defining us.

Figure out what matters most to you. Do your very best.

Sisters, again, do your very best. Wake up in the morning, dedicate your day to the Lord, move through your day, doing your best.

And do not not let if you just define you – prune that this spring.

Instead, let the Lord define you.

And that? That is beautiful.

Filed Under: Encouragement, Grace, Identity In Christ, Renewing The Mind, Sisterhood

What I Do With His Grace

April 23, 2012 By Natalie Snapp 21 Comments

Photo courtesy of Stock Exchange

Through bleary eyes, I find the alarm that’s daring to beckon me from a much-needed slumber.

“It cannot be 6 o’clock in the morning,” I think as I roll over and hit the “Snooze” button.

I do it again. And again.

Until finally, I’ve hit it so many times that I’m completely late and my inability to rouse myself from the warmth of my bed will now impact everyone else in the family.

No pressure, of course.

Getting three children under the age of seven dressed, ready, and fed by 7:30 a.m. is not my favorite thing to do. I cringe as I hear how I resemble the sound of that clanging gong we’re all told about in Corinthians.

“You have five minutes to finish breakfast, brush your teeth, and get your shoes on.”

“You don’t have time to play! Eat!”

“If your shoes aren’t in your shoe box, I don’t know where they are!”

“Get. In. The. Car.”

It’s the “Snooze” button’s fault.

I usually pack lunches the night before; however, there had been a string of life events that kept me up a bit late and it simply just didn’t get done.

Again I blame the “Snooze” button.

Grasping for something easy to pack, I find two “Foodles”, favorites of the children in my house and in the shape of Mickey Mouse’s head. I have only two for my three children but luckily, there are three Lunchables happily staring at me from the shelves in the refrigerator.

I realize that Lunchables go against the non-processed, all-organic lifestyle we hear so much about but a woman’s gotta have something in her “Emergency” kit for such a time as this.

Here’s the problem in this Finite Math equation – my youngest child doesn’t care for Lunchables (I know – smart kid.) Child A likes both while Child B and C prefer the “Foodle”.

Clearly, Child A would receive the Lunchable.

Except Child A was throwing a huge fit because she wasn’t getting the “Foodle”.

And now I must solve for X.

But instead of calmly explaining why this is to be so, I slam the Lunchable on the counter and tell her that this kind of behavior makes me want to scream and drives me crazy.

I might have followed it up with “For crying out loud!”

The room was silent and I saw my first-grade daughter shrink in her chair, tears threatening to escape the brim of her wide blue eyes.

She reacted with a tantrum and her mother did, too.

For a brief moment, I died inside. Condemnation began to rule my heart as I fought to save my children from myself.

It was then that I asked myself “What am I doing with His grace and mercy?”

These three beautiful faces and a husband like Jesus in a pick-up truck is proof of God’s grace. His mercy on a platter served up just for me.

With a checkered past and poor choices behind me, I’ve long felt they were His way of saying “You don’t deserve them but that’s how I roll. It’s called mercy. And you’re forgiven. That’s called grace.”

He has entrusted me with the grace and mercy He gave eight years ago when this family began with a walk down the aisle.

And this morning I was yelling at it, slamming a defenseless Lunchable on the counter and telling it that it’s behavior made me crazy.

No one said this motherhood thing was going to be easy. I know there will be times I erupt and it’s certainly not the first.

However, each time I strive for it to be my last because He has entrusted me with this mercy and grace. Yet I’m not so naive to think it actually will be the last time.

It’s obvious that I must do what I would want her to do if she was the one slamming the Lunchable – in humility, I go to my daughter and seek her forgiveness for my sharp-as-pins words. We pray and ask for God’s forgiveness for both of us.

We relish in His grace and are washed by the water at 7:30 a.m. on a Thursday morning.

I’m washed by the water later in the day when I struggle with hopeless thoughts.

I’m washed by the water as I lay my head on the pillow each night and seek His forgiveness for the myriad of other transgressions that occurred throughout the day.

And I rest in Him knowing that tomorrow I’ll be presented with new mercies that will allow me to start anew with His grace.

“…let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.” – Hebrews 10:22

Filed Under: Grace

Change and Acceptance

April 19, 2012 By Eryn Hall 11 Comments

I’m not who I was.

Eight years ago, my life was very different than the one I live today. If you knew me back then, you knew a girl who was selfish, immature, careless. Oh sure, I was nice and fun, I had friends and busied myself with stuff. But there was no purpose to my moments other than to do whatever pleased me. Even though I knew about God and gave my life to Him as a teenager, I wasn’t living my life for Him. I’d heard the story of Jesus, but my prayers were only sent up on an as-needed basis, and truthfully, it was more like begging.

And then, about 8 years ago, I opened myself to a relationship and fell in love with the Lord. I read all about Him, learned all about His ways. I determined in my heart to live in a way pleasing to Him. And my life changed. I was changed.

I looked the same on the outside, yet my behaviors were different. I was still a nice and fun girl, maybe nicer? And my fun became the good, careful, guilt-free kind. I thought about myself less and of others more. The closer I got to Jesus, the more I learned to know and express forgiveness, hope, grace, and unconditional love. I want to serve Him and I want people to get a glimpse of Jesus when they see me.

My life is very different now. Jesus is in every moment of every day. My prayer life is an ongoing dialog and I’m constantly praising Him. My life is different because it is tethered to Jesus Christ and God, now and forever.

There are some people in my life, though, that refuse to accept the changed me. They see me now, acting in a manner that seems foreign. Because they knew the old me, maybe they think I’m faking this new life. They hear me speaking the truth or praying God’s Word, and they shrug, thinking this “trend” I’ve caught on to will eventually pass and I’ll be back to the Eryn they knew. But, thank God, I’m not going back to who I was. I’ve been set free by God’s amazing grace.

And it’s hard to explain. This is the Eryn they knew, only now she lives with purpose. Now she has a light on the inside, a promise. Now she has a grasp on what this life is all about. It’s still me!

I can’t avoid my friends and loved ones who are waiting for me to change back. And I certainly can’t run in circles trying to prove my new self. All I can do is continue to live this life for God, be my new self confidently, and be an example to those around me. Even if the new me is not accepted by the people who knew me before, I know it’s okay to be changed.

It’s okay to be changed. I am accepted by Jesus.

You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

Ephesians 4:22-24 NIV

“God chose us to belong to Christ before the world was created. He chose us to be holy and without blame in his eyes. He loved us. So he decided long ago to adopt us as his children. He did it because of what Jesus Christ has done. It pleased God to do it. All those things bring praise to his glorious grace. God freely gave us his grace because of the One he loves.”

Ephesians 1:1-6 NIRV

image source

Filed Under: Encouragement, Freedom In Christ, Grace, Identity In Christ, Salvation

Starting Over

March 27, 2012 By Christina Gilliland 16 Comments

It is almost Spring now. The cold winter air will slowly be turning into a soft, warm breeze. The birds will start returning from their winter escape and the flowers buds will push through the empty spaces.

It is a time of starting new… of starting over.

It is almost like nature is showing with the changing of seasons what we all as God’s workmanship can experience too: starting over.

Do you feel today like you need to start over in an area of your life? I know I do. Within a week after writing this post on the deep love I was developing over God’s Word, I found myself pushing snooze on the alarm and not even opening the Bible. I had established such a faithful early morning routine with my Lord that I had come to cherish. How is it that I had already abandoned Him?

I allowed life to get in the way.

I put myself first and decided that I deserved more sleep, that I would get to my reading later, that I was too busy.

And all the while the distance between myself and God is getting wider and wider. And I can’t afford to let that happen.

So as the seasons have been slowly changing, so has my heart. I haven’t really been blogging, or doing any Twitter, or any social media, for that matter. My e-mail inbox is currently 143 unopened messages and I don’t know when I am going to go back to writing regularly.

And you know what? I’m OK with that. I am taking the time I need to, “Be still and know that He is God.” To rediscover my close relationship with Him. To reopen that Bible. To start over.

I’m so thankful God allows us to start over…to recommit…to renew ourselves.

And He is always ready to welcome us back with open arms. His grace is unmeasurable and abounding in mercy. How undeserving we all are of such grace! But it is here for the taking. Won’t you receive and allow yourself to start over?

As the birds start singing a new song of Spring, so will my heart hum the melody of His love, “Amazing Grace How sweet the sound!”

What about you? What area of your life do you feel is lacking? Is in need of a change? Don’t forget that you are not alone! And most importantly, God Loves You no matter what. Run to Him and start over…

Blessings

Filed Under: Encouragement, Grace, Renewing The Mind

Don’t Give Up! Loving a Difficult Person

March 26, 2012 By Teri Lynne Underwood 12 Comments

Remember last month when I asked if you’ve ever wondered if managing all the “stuff” of relationships is worth it? And, if we are all honest, sometimes we feel like it’s just not. Well, I have to imagine that Ruth may have felt the same way at some point. Remember her? {Hint, there’s a book with her name in the Old Testament.}

Her husband died. Her brother-in-law died. Her father-in-law died. Her mother-in-law decided to move back to her homeland. And Ruth, because of the cultural expectation at the time, was obligated to go with her. But Naomi told Ruth not to come, freed her from the bond, and encouraged her to go home – politely at first, then more urgently.

Ruth refused, giving us one of the most poignant declarations of faith in all of Scripture … claiming not just relationship with Naomi but also belief and loyalty to Naomi’s God. {See Ruth 1:16-17}

Naomi’s response?

“And when Naomi saw that she was determined to go with her, she said no more.” (1:18 ESV)

Nice, huh? No “Welcome” or “Thank you” or a word of encouragement or instruction. Nothing. Naomi said nothing. When they arrived at Bethlehem, Naomi had a declaration of her own, not of God’s grace and provision but rather a declaration of despair.

So the two of them went on until they came to Bethlehem. And when they came to Bethlehem, the whole town was stirred because of them. And the women said, “Is this Naomi?” She said to them, “Do not call me Naomi; call me Mara, for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me. I went away full, and the Lord has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi, when the Lord has testified against me and the Almighty has brought calamity upon me?” (Ruth1:19-21 ESV, emphasis added)

Naomi was bitter … we know this because she renamed herself Mara. Naomi meant “pleasant,” Mara means “bitter.” Anyone enjoy spending a lot of time with a bitter person?

Naomi believed she had nothing … verse 21, “I went away full, and the Lord has brought me back empty.” I don’t know about you, but if I’d been Ruth, that would have stung a bit.

But rather than treat this bitter, negative woman who was in the midst of a great big pity party with equal bitterness or disrespect, we find that Ruth extended courtesy, respect, and honor … truthfully, that was far beyond what could be reasonably expected of her.

Sometimes we have to do that same thing, don’t we? Grace. It’s tough. Easier to just walk away. Ruth gives us this beautiful example of what a friendship between two women can look like … even if only one is willing.

Sometimes, my friends, we plant those seeds of kindness and it hurts to watch them be buried beneath the frost of someone who rejects our efforts. Learning to trust God’s timing in relationships can be one of our greatest struggles. Perhaps you are dealing with a friend who is bitter or “frosty” right now. It’s hard. But this I know: We can be sure that God remains in control and when we submit ourselves to His plan and His timing, what blooms will bring His Name honor.

How do you deal with the difficult people in your life? What lessons about grace have you learned through managing tough relationships?

Next month, we’ll continue looking at this story of Ruth and Naomi. There are some lessons in here we just can’t afford to miss. I’m already excited about what we’ll be exploring.

Image Credit

Filed Under: Encouragement, Friendships, Grace, Sisterhood

Seeds Of The Heart

March 13, 2012 By Kris Camealy 14 Comments

I’m not a very good gardener. I lack the knowledge and skills necessary for producing anything more than a mediocre crop of random odds and ends. In the five summers I have worked my garden soil over, we have garnered just a fraction of it’s potential yield.

The truth is, I don’t keep the garden up as I should. I lack the knowledge because I don’t invest the time it takes to gain an understanding of effective gardening methods. I wish I had a better excuse.

I lack the commitment. I lack the know-how. Too often, I lack the motivation to keep it up properly. And of all the garden-soul analogies out there, this is the one on my heart these days; If my heart is the fertile soil where Christ’s love can grow and flourish, then fear is a rogue seed that has slipped in beneath the soil and bloomed unwelcome.

Fear has burrowed itself deep in, and while I might clip it’s leaves back from time to time, reciting scripture, or taking one small but brave step out in faith, fear flourishes in the garden of my heart- a thorny thistle threatening to crown out fruit that has potential to nourish.

How many times have I been stabbed unexpectedly by fear’s sharp edged thorns? Some seasons, the punctures are too numerous to count, and I have bled out and shirked back from harvesting for the greater reward. Fear’s stealthy roots spread like wildfire under the surface, and in the places I least expect to see it, those thorny pricks appear, nestled right in between the juicy strawberries and tomatoes. Taunting me with their rows and rows of thorned-teeth leaves.

While I am not a good gardener, there is One who knows His way around the soil of my inner parts. He never-minds the muck and mud that I’ve tracked all over and when I ask Him, when I am willing to seek His help, He uproots the misplaced weed and carefully covers the holes left behind. It’s an unending task, this rooting out the foul seeds.

On my own I am incapable. I allow fear to reign in my garden because she’s mean and pointed. Because even when I want her ripped out by her tree-like stem, her spiked stalk gives me pause and so I say, “tomorrow, I’ll pull that weed out tomorrow, when I am feeling more brave.”

But I am not finished. At the rate that pest spreads in the hot dry seasons of discontent, I may never be finished cutting her down. But when my hands are tired and my knees ache and I bring in just a tiny bowl from the garden, I am reminded that Christ knows His way around the gardens of our hearts. He knows the struggles we have and the seeds we let bloom where we should not.

He is patient, He is relentless, and He teaches us again and again how to nurture the good seeds the way He does. He reminds us that in order to keep our gardens producing, we need the know-how. We need to know Him.

Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:8-9

Have you allowed weeds to bloom in your heart? What is your struggle these days? How might we pray for you as you dig in and learn to garden along side the great gardener?

Filed Under: Fear, Grace, Restoration

Like Broken Boards and Shattered Glass

February 29, 2012 By Guest 12 Comments

I drive by this old house on our way to church, often wondering what kind of stories were once lived out within its now crumbling walls. How many feet walked upon those broken floorboards when they were still smooth and gleaming with self-assurance?

Time has revealed the short-lived stability of a structure that long ago stood proud in it’s young strength and beauty. But years of declension required the county to take possession of that home. It was unfit to live in and beyond repair and scheduled to be condemned.

I wonder how many hours were spent trying to rehabilitate the dilapidated building…surely there was a long, ever-increasing list of needed repairs.

A bit like my soul I’m afraid, worn down by this sinful nature. There was a time in my life when my nature didn’t look so bad to me. I was a “good girl” full of self-assurance, proud of the strength and beauty of youth. I didn’t understand sin. I thought it was something I could keep under control. Just repair it, check it off the list, and move on to the next improvement.

But I didn’t see the faulty wiring hidden behind the plaster and paint. I didn’t notice the cracks in the old foundation that caused unbalanced walls to lose their strength. I didn’t know there was mold trying to gain access to every hidden space within this life.

” … it is sin living in me.” Romans 7:17

The damage eventually became visible to me, but no matter how many repairs I checked off the list in an attempt to maintain, the deterioration continued. I could not carry out this job on my own.

“I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” Romans 7:18

Time reveals that the effects of sin eventually lead to a life that is beyond repair.

“What a wretched (wo)man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?” Romans 7:24

Self-help and step-programs are only sufficient for a life of short-lived stability. What we really need is to hand over this dilapidated life of sin to be condemned, and move in to a better life, beautifully created upon a solid new foundation.

“Thanks be to God–through Jesus Christ our Lord!” Romans 7:25

“… he condemned sin in sinful man.” Romans 8:3

Condemned. Just like that building that was beyond repair and taken over by the county to be destroyed because it was unfit to live in, He took possession of our irreparable sin and destroyed it upon the cross.

“I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.” Galatians 2:20

The written repair list and continuous effort were powerless against the inevitable.

“…a man is not justified by the works of the law but by faith in Jesus Christ” Galatians 2:16

“For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son.” Romans 8:3

His Son came to give us a new life, built upon a solid foundation.

“I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” John 10:10

“For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.”1 Corinthians 3:11

I do believe that old house along the road we see on our way to church lingers in it’s final stages as a reminder to me from a gracious and compassionate God who loves me. A reminder to flee from the life of sin, to flee from the broken boards and shattered glass as they come crashing down, by the power of His mighty hand.

Stacy

I’m a wife of 15 years and a mom of 5 boys ages 7 to 17, welcomed into my heart through marriage, birth, and adoption. I walk daily in God’s grace, desperately clinging to His Word as I home-school, home-make, and seek to grow in Christ. I blog at Daily Surrender to Jesus.